Category - Faith

Pouring Into Our Children

If you’ve read any of my Love Languages blog posts you know that we all give and receive love in unique ways. Our children are no different. While you may feel loved and love by giving hugs (physical touch), your child may feel cared about more with kind words.

It’s important to pour into our children on a daily basis. While some days are easier than others the end result of them knowing you are on their side even when it feels like no one else is, is totally worth it.

Lately I’ve been reading “Love and Logic“, by Foster Cline, while it’s not a new book by any means it has some pretty relevant parenting tips. The more I read and hear people speak on the topic of parenting, the more I realize we only have these children in our care for 18 years. Then, most of them are out on their own, becoming their own people, and hopefully including us in their “grown-up” lives.

There are so many ways to let our children know we love them and support them, while also allowing them to learn life lessons and grow.

Here are a few ways (with love language guidance) you can show your children how much you care:

Words of Affirmation

Handwritten notes may come to mind as a way to express how we feel with words. To make notes a little more fun try to place them in areas that will surprise your children, tuck a sweet note in their shoe, or leave a thoughtful card in their backpack.

Physical Touch

Warm hugs can make any child melt if done at the right time and place. Be mindful of when you think your child may need a little extra TLC. Physical touch can be holding a hand, rubbing their back, or even playing with their hair.

Acts of Service

While it’s true a lot of parents are always showing their love through “acts of service”, folding laundry, picking up toys, but these things may go unnoticed, so try to think out of the box. What tasks do your children do for themselves that they might enjoy not doing once and a while? If your child packs their lunch, but doesn’t love it, why not make them an extra special one?! Bring the trash cans back to the house without them noticing, an act of service can be a delightful surprise. {This is not to say we should take over chores for our kids, but occasionally it can be seen by them as an act of love.}

Quality Time

Spending time doing homework or running errands with your child is time, but doesn’t quite quite qualify as “quality time”. Sorry parents!! If your child enjoys surprises, by all means, choose an activity that you can do together and surprise them after school or on a weekend. On the other hand, if your child is more of a planner, sit down with them and plan something fun to do together, this will double the quality time in both planning and doing.

 

Gifts

If you’ve read my blog post on gifts you’ll know the present doesn’t have to be extravagant, just thoughtful. It’s a really great idea to write down things that you’ve heard your child mention they really like, for example, if they say they really like pink roses, take note for a future day. If they are frustrated because their favorite markers are running low on ink, grab them a new pack and surprise them.

 

The only way we can truly pour into our children, no matter what Love Language they may have, is to invest in them. Your child doesn’t need to be your whole world, in fact they really shouldn’t be, {that’s another blog post}, however, just as with any relationship, you have to put time, effort, and care into it for it to flourish.

 

For those of you who read my blog, but aren’t parents or around children on a daily basis, can I encourage you to reach out to youth? You may not realize it, but you have so much to offer the next generations. Volunteer, find a neighbor, there are so many children who would benefit from your time, trust me.

What are you going to do to pour into your child(ren)??

Exploring Love Languages – Words of Affirmation

 

“Words can build you up,
Words can break you down,
Start a fire in your heart or
Put it out.”

 

These are some of the lyrics of the song Words by Hawk Nelson. This has been true since the beginning of the spoken word, even as children we proclaimed in a sing-songy voice “sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me”. We sang this not because it was true, but as a chant to ward off the pain that some harsh words can bring.

Though everyone is impacted in some way by words, there are some of us that give words great value. This means that discouraging or hurtful words feel even more sharp, and words of praise and encouragement mean the world to us. If it isn’t obvious by the way I’m describing this Love Language, Words of Affirmation is the number one way I feel loved.

 

 

Welcome to another installment of the Exploring Love Languages series on MommyB Knows Best. If you still haven’t read the  or taken your 5 Love Languages test (or test your family/friends) I strongly encourage you to check it out Exploring Love Languages and How to Show Them post.

If you know your love language(s) that will help you understand how you most like to be loved and also be a good determining factor in how you typically show love. Showing love to others is great no matter what way you choose to show it but in some instances love is received best using the love language of those we pour our love into. If we really care, I believe it’s important to get to know not only their personality but their love language as well.

Let’s dive into yet another love language and learn together. Each love language is so unique and I’d love your help, if you fit in the current category or know some great ways to show love using this love language won’t you please leave a comment with some advice?

 

To someone who doesn’t share this Love Language here are some ways to express love to people who value Words of Affirmation:

Use high value words

The words love, grateful, appreciate, proud, special, needed, best are some great words to focus on when speaking with someone who likes Words of Affirmation. Can you think of any others?

Compliment them

Pick something you really like about that person and tell them, it may not come easy to compliment, but will mean the world to them. Also, the more personal and specific you can get the better. Try to compliment them in an area that you know they work especially hard in. For example, if they volunteer a lot it’s likely that’s something they love and will be honored that you think enough to mention it.

Write it down

Words of Affirmation don’t have to be spoken words, they can also be written, whether it’s in a card, text, or a short note these words will be appreciated.

Reader Megan H says, “Words is not my love language but I speak words very well as words is one of my husbands love languages and also my daughters. Simple text each day to say you love them or are thinking of them are great. Also lovers of words like cards and simple notes too.”

As with all Love Languages there are several ways to show love in the way a specific person feels it. These are just a few ways to get you started. Do you have any advice on how to love (or how not to love) a person whose love language is Words of Affirmation?? Share in the comments below and if this is your love language be sure to share this post with others.

Holding On to Grief

I’m the type of person who holds on to everything.

My brain always says:

“Just in case…”

“You never know…”

“Better safe than sorry…”

I didn’t grow up with much, maybe that’s why. Hold on to things you may need.

I also hold on to other things. On both sides of my family growing up I saw grudges. Hold on to grudges.

I also saw a lot of people come and go, family members, people that I was close to. Hold on to people. 

Not liking conflict and having big feelings (as I now know I’m an HSP) Hold on to feelings. Bottling up emotions, especially the hard ones were what I became good at. At least until it was too much to contain, ending in tears, and frustration, just to start filling up the bottle again.

While I’ve learned a lot about myself and learning how to express my emotions I often continue to carry my own burdens. Hold on to burdens. You may be thinking we do need to carry our burdens, that’s often what my head tells me, but we have a God who died to carry those burdens, we have a God who tells us to allow people close to us to help us walk through those hard times.

Last night I was reminded that doing that to myself, making myself bear the grief of losing my mom and others grief, is my own pride. I know it sounds weird to think that taking that upon myself is pride, but really thinking about it, I feel like I’m the only one who understands it, the only one who can fix it. In reality, by holding onto it I’m not resolving anything, just letting it sit there.

I often forget or intentionally hold on to things I should be giving to God, whether it’s my day or burdens/worries that I carry. Can you relate? This is something I will probably always struggle with, but I think acknowledging that it’s something I need help with and trying to make a change is a good step in the right direction. This time I need to choose to Hold on to God’s promises.

Is there anything you are holding on to? Is this something you are willing to give to God or let others help you shoulder???

From the Makers of Veggie Tales comes Jelly Telly


From the makers of Big Idea, Veggie Tales, 3,2,1 Penguins, and more fun Christian programming comes…… JELLY TELLY!!

Since my introduction to Veggie Tales at Sunday School, (as a high-schooler,) I have loved these cute crudites! Bob and Larry made me laugh while reminding me about the simple things that God is constantly teaching us. Even though these animated story tellers were geared towards children it’s easy for anyone to catch on, and end up rolling on the floor laughing.

I knew that when I had children I would want them to watch Veggie Tales too. So, I asked for the videos at each holiday and bought a few myself. Most of them are VHS but someday I’ll work towards a DVD set.

Just this year we found out that Veggie Tales are now…”On TV!!!” It’s basically a new introduction and lead into the story but they’ve kept most of the same stories to teach Sunday Morning values.

Jelly Telly is a fun website that features Christian media, including games and videos. It’s a great way to get more of the great message of the Bible to our youngsters. Co-Creator of Big Idea, Phil Vischer wants to “Bring the Bible to Life.” Not only are they providing great materials but they’re also inspiring and hiring upcoming new Christian children media designers. Which I think is pretty cool.

They have everything from animation to puppets to human actors. I feel like they have something for everyone, so if you get a chance to go to their website: Jelly Telly
check out some of the fun characters and creations.


Also for those of you Veggie fans Minnesota Cuke and the Search for Noah’s Umbrella will be released in the U.S. and Canada on DVD on July 31st in Christian bookstores and August 1st in the general market.